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Moses’ “Staff Meeting” 02/12/2023

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Welcome and Prayer: Nancy Lopez

Good morning!  Welcome to RefleXion.          The Lord is with you.

Last week Chuck talked about parables and their working into our soil though we don’t even realizeit.  Then, later, we might recognize or realize something by the pattern that had been planted.  I love that idea and the idea that changing our viewpoint…well, changes our point of view!

I want to share a word with you that I’ve been playing with for a couple of years; that word is “Realize, “but I think of it as “Real Eyes,” gazing at the unseen Real.  It has to do with seeing differently, the Reál, the Royal Way, the Jesus Way.  In other words, seeing something for what it is vs. what I prefer, what I’ve been taught, or what I’ve always thought.  Maybe it’s not a complete picture, but something I didn’t see before is “Real-Eyesed,” something more Real. 

I’m referring today to two woman mystics.  First, I’m reading a quote from Evelyn Underhill (20th century) in her devotional “Light of Christ.”  Listen for how she uses the word “realize.”

“You know how sometimes one goes to see a church which one is told has magnificent windows—and seen from outside they all look alike—dull, thick, grubby. We probably say, ‘Well! It is obvious there is good glass here, but we cannot realise it.’ Then we open the door and go inside—leave the outer world, enter the inner world—and the universal light floods through the windows and bathes us in their colour and beauty and significance, shows us things of which we had never dreamed, a loveliness that lies beyond the fringe of speech. And so, in the same way we cannot realise God and His eternal Truth and Beauty, from outside. One constantly hears people commenting on Christianity from outside and missing the point every time. They are on the wrong side of the wall. How important then it is for us to be familiar with the inner vision. It is from within the place of prayer, recollection, worship, and love, where the altar is, where the sacrifice is made, where we are all bound together in a life of communion and self-giving to God, that we fully and truly receive the revelation which is made though Christ. To re-enter that Cathedral, receive a fresh gift from its inexhaustible beauty, see through those windows more and more of the light of God, that is the secret of meditation.”

That is how, I believe, we can real-eyes God’s viewpoint and be on the Real Way of Jesus, the New Way of the Spirit.

Our prayer this morning is from the thoughts of Dame Julian of the 14th century:
Lord, we remember what was revealed to your daughter Julian, her vision of Christ that was ‘Light, Life and Love’ and that everything was gathered in that.  May Your Spirit show us the Truth, quicken us to fresh vitality, and fill us with adoring devotion. May we real-eyes Your Vision for us. We come into the silence now to real-eyes more Light, Life and Love. We come to contemplate our Christian treasure from the inside, in the Real, the Way of Jesus.  Amen

Morning Talk: chuck smith, jr.

The LORD spoke to Moses, saying, “Speak to the people of Israel, and get from them staffs, one for each fathers’ house, from all their chiefs according to their fathers’ houses, twelve staffs. Write each man’s name on his staff, and write Aaron’s name on the staff of Levi. For there shall be one staff for the head of each father’s house. Then you shall deposit them in the tent of meeting before the testimony, where I meet with you. And the staff of the man whom I choose shall sprout. . . .
On the next day, Moses went into the tent of the testimony, and behold, the staff of Aaron for the house of Levi had sprouted and put forth buds and produced blossoms, and it bore ripe almonds. Numbers 17:1-11

Intro: This is an odd story

Not only for the strange miracle that God sets up,
– but also because it seems unnecessary in the context of the larger narrative
• the people of Israel were disappointed and discouraged
◦ their situation was primed for discontent and insurrection
• four rebellions had been staged and subdued:
◦ Moses’ sister and brother (ch. 12)
◦ the whole nation turned from God at the border of Canaan (ch. 14)
◦ a clan of rebels that refused to follow Moses any further (16:1-3, 12-34)
◦ a crew of Levites, who claimed rights to the priesthood (16:4-11, 35)
– in each instance, God intervened and punished the rebels
• so God’s choice for priesthood and service in the sanctuary would seem obvious
• however, considering Israel’s state of mind, and history of complaint and stubbornness,
◦ extra evidence for God’s choice may have been required

At that time, and in desert, a staff had many uses:
– support for standing and walking, herding flocks and cattle, prying, and as a weapon
• staffs were personalized – you could identify its owner by looking at it (cf. Gen. 38:25-26)
• in two passages–I know of–a staff is coupled with a scepter (Gen. 49:10; Num. 21:17-18)
◦ the staff was a symbol of leadership
◦ that is why each staff here was one that belonged to the head of a community
– so if we give this story a title, it could be “Moses’ Staff Meeting”

There is something else in this story I find strange

The test will be to see which staff will “sprout”
– what would it take to qualify one staff as the winner?
• a fresh, green twig? a short twig with one small leaf?
◦ what Moses found the next morning was that Aaron’s staff
had sprouted and put forth buds and produced blossoms, and it bore ripe almonds (v. 8)
• doesn’t that sound excessive?
Robert Alter, “. . . this fast-forwarding of a slow process of growth spectacularly confirms the miraculous character of the event.”
◦ a line from Bruce Almighty comes to mind
“Okay, now you’re just showing off”
– as I was meditating on this passage, I wondered,
• “Is there more to this story than what I’m seeing?”
◦ the thought that came to me was:
◦ perhaps God is saying something here about the leader he chooses
• so I read it again, and found a possible meaning:
◦ some personal characteristics of a person God is pleased to use
◦ then I made a list

There is nothing novel or profound about my list
– as I go over these items, you’re going to think, “Of course”
• still, they were a good reminder for me
• and since God hasn’t given me a new series topic yet,
◦ I’m going to share my mediation with you
– I believe that what I have to say applies to every follower of Jesus

The miracle took place in the inner chamber of God’s sanctuary

I’ve been reading Tyler Staton’s, Pray Like Monks, Live like Fools
– he doesn’t say anything we haven’t heard or don’t know already,
• but he does well in reminding us and nudging us toward God
Staton, “. . . this book is an invitation to what cannot be taught, only discovered. . . . An invitation to be found by God in the place he’s most faithfully been found throughout history: not in a megachurch with Broadway lights and arena-rock fog machines or in the eloquent podcast of a contrarian thinker, but in the bare silence of you and the endless expanse beyond you.”
• the inner chamber is where God reveals his presence
– prayer is our conscious connection with God
• okay–my grandchildren use me, and I know it
◦ when they were small and lived with us,
◦ would come into my room and sit on my lap, just to be with me – nothing more
• for our prayer to become an encounter,
◦ we need to realize it’s more than just asking for things
◦ it’s resting in the invisible, yet real and holy Presence

So, the first characteristic of God’s chosen servant is prayer
– this is where the miracle begins – where our lives are changed

The next characteristic is LIFE

When the Hebrew Scriptures take a jab at idols, they point out the fact that idols are lifeless
. . . every goldsmith is put to shame by his idols,
for his images are false,
and there is no breath in them (Jer. 10:14)
– I think now, perhaps more than ever, we need to be cautious
• we can fabricate a religious experience – a sense of “church”
• I met a young man, raised Christian and in charge of an inner city mission
◦ but he had stopped believing in God
◦ but still, he was working to create a church-like community without a god
– how much do we need God or depend on God to do church?
• it’s possible to create a lot of programs for people,
◦ so they don’t feel the emptiness of not encountering God
◦ many Christian leaders believe they must control people, and they use programs to do it
• the word “fabricate” has two meanings:
◦ to manufacture something and to make up something untrue
◦ we do both when we make something that looks like a work of God, but isn’t

God is the Giver of life – he gives new life to his people
– Jesus said that those who believe and follows his teaching
have passed from death to life (Jn. 4:24)
• this message saturates the New Testament, so I won’t press the point (especially the writings of John)
• if we live a God-given life, we don’t have to fake anything
– coupled with life, is growth – and there is no end to this

The next characteristic is FRUIT

Jesus emphasized fruit as goal of our relationship with him
I am the true vine, and my Father is the vine-dresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit (Jn. 15:102)
– when Jesus warned his followers of “false prophets,” he said,
You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit . . . Thus you will recognize them by their fruits (Mt. 7:15)
• I am much more at peace with myself than I used to be
• there was a time when I hated having an unproductive day
◦ and right up there with unproductive was being ineffective
◦ days are important, but what counts is my whole life
– others will produce more fruit than I have – that’s cool
• I just want to be as fruitful as God wants me to be

Another characteristic is BEAUTY

I get that from the blossom that the staff produced
– there is a beauty that is superficial and can be disappointing
• St. Peter encouraged women to adorn
the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Pe. 3:4)
• there’s no good reason not to apply that instruction to men as well
– there are times when we want to look our best,
• but it would not hurt, if every day we asked ourselves,
◦ “Am I a beautiful person?”
◦ “Do I add beauty to the world through my presence, words, and actions?”
• compassion is beautiful; generosity can be beautiful;
◦ forgiveness is beautiful; kindness is beautiful;
◦ the gift of a flower, or a smile, or a hug can be beautiful

The last characteristic I imagine is FRAGRANCE

Like beauty, I relate that to the blossom
– it has to do with the impression we make and leave on others
For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance of life to life. Who is sufficient for these things? (2 Cor. 2:15-16)

Conclusion: I don’t want to leave you with impression that this is all up to you

As we read, it was God who caused the staff to sprout
God gives us life and makes us fruitful and beautiful and fragrant

My first “real” job was working at a fish and chips restaurant. The other employees and I did everything. We cut up the fish, battered and deep fried them, deep fried the chips, wrapped it all up and sold them to the customers. Because my work was close to my home, I could walk both ways. My high school was between work and home. One Friday evening, walking home I noticed there was a dance happening at the school, so I got in line to buy a ticket. But after a couple minutes, I heard a girl somewhere in the line behind me say, “I smell fish!” Quietly I exited the line and went home.
My aroma that evening was not the result of applying a new cologne (eau de poisson), but from being emerged in the atmosphere of my job.

If we spend time in the garden of prayer, we’ll come out smelling like roses

September 29, 2019

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This week we were fortunate that Kelsey Kapauff was able to be with us and share what she has learned and experienced in her spiritual journey.

Contemplation
Set an Intent: Welcoming Prayer

Thank you for the honor of being here with you today.
I am going to be talking with you about contemplation! The funny thing about me sitting up here is that to be honest I wouldn’t call myself a contemplative. I have been on a path that has led me to the contemplative tradition the past couple years, but I am very much still a student of the tradition.
When I started learning about the idea of contemplation I was captivated.
I almost immediately took a class to learn more and the thing I loved about this class was that we weren’t only learning about contemplation intellectually but we were encouraged to explore the contemplative practices as well.. Meditation being one of them.
Now I have two kids… and trying to meditate in the mornings is almost impossible with them around.
I would sit to meditate, and the kids would come rushing in, interrupt me. And I would be left with a feeling of frustration that I didn’t get what I needed, and then I would react to my kids often in a short and frustrated way.
Until one day I was listening to an interview one of my teachers did with a young mom. She was having the same issue as me. She was so excited about her contemplative journey, and she would wake up with this longing to connect with God, but inevitably her kids would come in and interrupt her, leaving her left with a sense of frustration.
My teacher responded to her like this- “I want you to imagine for a moment that I am God, and then talk to me about what been going on….”
Talking to the professor as “God” she then explained her predicament. He then said now I want you to imagine I am God talking to you…
As “God”, he responded with something like, “I see your longing for me, your love for me… and it so delights me. The thing is…. I love you so much that I want to hold and be held by you, so I jump into the bodies of you kids and run out to you so that we can simply embrace each other.”
As I heard this story I wept.
It made me realize in that moment that my pursuit and my “trying” to connect with God can become the very thing that get in the way of me seeing that we are connected…..
What if the very thing that is interrupting, or distracting us, is in itself a part of how we can connect with God, instead of a thing getting in the way of our connection to God?
God comes to us disguised as our very lives.- Paula D’Arcy
So…

Next morning I tried seeing differently but I just ended up:
• Responding “better” on the outside
• Rejecting and suppressing my feelings and thoughts…
• Praying it away- note: sometimes prayer can distract us from the present…
Eventually I could do nothing but
Surrender- let go of everything I was holding onto. I simply stopped trying to change myself and the situation. In doing so I just chose to be present to what was.
In the letting go, in my relinquishing of control I experienced something I couldn’t describe. My kids ran out and its as if a layer was lifted from my eyes and I saw God in them. I felt this deep connection to God in their presence.
I was overwhelmed with love, my eyes welled with tears, and I breathed in deep this indescribable moment.
Its as if I saw love living and moving within and around me…
In the letting go, I realized what I was looking for, striving for, was simply there all along. On the outside nothing had changed, but internally I experienced a shift in how I saw, a shift in my awareness.
I had been learning about contemplation, but this was one of my first moments experiencing it. _______________________________________________________________________ Contemplation is something that story can describe a lot better than hard definitions can…
Its hard to define because much of it is truly beyond our understanding, and therefore beyond our descriptions. So as we talk about contemplation today I want to start off by saying that no explanation of contemplation can touch the depth of what it is.
Its like talking about an orgasm- you can explain the crap out of it, but experiencing it is a whole other thing.

In Philipians 2:5, Paul says, “Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus”
I love this.
Paul isn’t saying
May you know the same things as Jesus knew He isn’t saying
May you have a mind that is similar to Jesus mind He is talking about
A merging of minds
May the “same” mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus… He is talking about acquiring the consciousness of Christ.

This is contemplation.
It is a mode of perception that is in tune with the divine…
An encounter with pure awareness itself, an encounter with the greater truth. Thomas Merton describes Contemplation like this:
“It is life itself, fully awake, fully active, and fully aware it is alive. It is spiritual wonder. It is spontaneous awe at the sacredness of life, of being.”
It is this way of seeing that goes beyond our normal observable realities.

Most of us function from a lens of object awareness most of the time.
We are focused on something. A person, a place, an emotion, a though, and we spend our conscious energy on the thing that is the object of our attention.
Right now the object of your attention can either be me, or a daydream you are going with in your mind, or maybe its something else your looking at in this room…
Our “normal” conscious state splits and focuses, splits and focuses…
But when it comes to God there is no splitting.
He is omnipresent with all.
God doesn’t function with object awareness, and if he did that would really suck for all of us if he could only focus on us one at a time…
But what we know and believe to be true about God is that he is simultaneously with us all, present to us all. And not only us, he is present to all of creation…
This kind of consciousness is objectless.
Its a whole other kind of perceiving, and seeing…
Another phrase to describe this mode of awareness is: _________________________
Non-Dual Seeing.
Which is a mode of seeing that doesn’t separate.
As we know dual thinking is thinking that splits. good and bad
Us and them
Weak and strong
Conservative liberal Beautiful ugly

Dual thinking is important as we are first forming concepts.
For example when my daughter was learning about temperature, she learned it in the context of its opposite.
She knew something was hot because she had felt something cold. But now that she is getting older she’s realizing that those two opposing extremes cannot hold the breadth of the various temperatures.
So although dual thinking serves a purpose for all of us, it can only take us so far… Especially with religion.
If we view God as being out there, then we wont spend time learning to pay attention to what he is saying in here, we will simply be waiting and looking out.
If we only expect to feel near to God at church, or at the beach, or wherever it is we seem to look for God, then our eyes can be blind to Gods movement in other spaces.
Non dual consciousness takes away the lines, God is no longer out there, or in here, or over there.
God is in all. Immanent in you and I, yet simultaneously transcendent and above you and I… This way of seeing opens us up to so much more than our categories allow.
Non-dualistic thinking allows us to get outside of the mind that wants us to split and categorize and allows us to simply hold what is.
Its a wider more expansive view that is awake to deeper realties… __
I do want to make clear that the purpose of non-dual consciousness isn’t to diminish our differences… or to be blind to them…
That line of thought can be unhelpful and even destructive…
Being color-blind is a good example of this. When we are “color blind” we fail to recognize both the beauty in a person of color and the pain that has been caused by systemic systems of oppression… which then can keep us from doing what we can to build a more loving world.
Non-dual consciousness, simply expands our view and takes the attention off of what separates.
In this sense we can more fully celebrate the unique beauty of our differences when they are not all that we see, when they are not the objects of our attention…

This state of awareness that taps into the deeper streams of truth that our categories can blind us to…
As humans most of us have experienced what it is like to see with these non-dual eyes… even if we have just had small glimpses…

We often experience these non-dual moments when we experience great pain, or great love because these experiences often have the ability to shatter our comfortable categories…
For example:
When you fall in love with someone of a different race than you, that you once looked down upon.
Category of us and them shattered.
When you do something that really hurt someone else, that you never though you would do. Category of good and bad shattered.
When your baby is born with special needs, and your previous perceptions are shattered because that baby is the most beautiful person you have ever laid eyes on…
When you go through something that is beyond painful, yet it ends up being one the most beautiful inner experiences…
When we experience something that simple categories simply cant describe… It often encourages us towards a more non-dual mindset…
I experienced this when I was with my dear friend who recently lost her husband to suicide.
We were packing up her home, putting in boxes her memories, he life that was permeated with her husband Andrews presence. It was a painfully sacred experience. We packed, and cried. Packed and cried. At the end of the day, after packing all of their things, it was time for her three beautiful boys to go to bed. The thing about life is that even in midst the greatest pain, it doesn’t stop. I wanted to help, but they understandably wanted their mom. I waited in the other room as my exhausted (on every level) friend, then put her boys to sleep. After some time, she walked out of their bedroom.
I watched as she walked over to where I was sitting and simply collapsed to the ground. I had never experienced anything like this before. I watched as the pain in her heart manifested in her body, and all she could do was fall to the floor.
We sat there on the floor together weeping, holding each other. I can’t come close to imagining all that was happening within her in that moment. The pain that I was feeling was deep, but nothing close to what she was sitting in. It was just too much. We started to ask God Why? Confused, angry, and utterly broken. Simultaneously bewildered by God, His presence permeated that moment. Love was alive. Love was alive in the questions, in the pain, in the embracing of each other, in every confusing piece, love was there. It was one of the most raw and real moments of my life.
In the brokenness the thing that was so apparent to me was the sacredness of it all. To be with her in that moment, will always be one of my most dear memories. Which sounds odd… How could one fo the most painful moments of my life be one of the most beautiful?
There is no explanation that could make sense of it all, it simply was.
It was this moment of expansive embrace of the whole.
A moment of intense oneness with each other, and with God.

The difficult thing is that this way of seeing cant be forced. We cant just put on these new eyes whenever we want…
But we can offer up a posture of least resistance, so that we may be overcome- as James Finley describes…
Paul goes on in Phil 2 to describe that what that posture of least resistance looks like…
5 Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus,
6 who, though he was in the form of God,
did not regard equality with God
as something he should cling to,
7 instead He emptied himself,
So in order to enter into the consciousness of Christ, Jesus emptied himself…
The greek word for this emptying being (kenosis)- the act of self- emptying, this beautiful act of Surender..
And he says the opposite of self emptying is clinging.. I mean visually think about the difference…
Cling- crouch over, protective stance, holding tightly, often holding of breath Emptying- a release, openness, vulnerable, exhale
This is why breathing exercises are so powerful in our path of surrender, when we pay attention to our breath we recognize were again and again, releasing…

This process of kenosis.. can often bring up some scary things within us that can make us pull back into clinging…
We all have things that we are currently clinging to… things that are not easy to release…
Things that our Ego does not want to let go of, things we cling to our of our desire to protect ourselves, things we cling to that make us feel comfortable…

  • It’s interesting because in my own process of surrender, one of the hardest thing for me to let go of was my certainty about God.
  • I was taught to read the Bible in a certain way.
  • I was taught that God moved in specific ways.
  • And I was taught that if you had deep faith, you surely wouldn’t doubt the doctrines that my
    specific tradition taught…
  • I studied theology and I came out of bible school pretty confident.
  • I quickly became a pastor and I watched as people clung to my confidence about what I
    believed and made it their own.. I not only felt truly confident that I held many truths, My ego loved, I mean loveddd feeling important.
    Little by little as time went on I realized that I spent a lot of time being spoon-fed what to believe, and I was taught very little about how to believe.
  • I was asked one time about my thoughts on heaven and hell and as I confidently answered I listened to myself speaking so confidently, and my inner voice was saying “you don’t really know!!!”
    I was clinging more to what I knew about God than to God himself…. That was and still is a very humbling realization….
    How comical that I had to let go and surrender some of my certainty about God, in order to “put on this mind of Christ” Paul is talking about.
    This was a surrendering of a large part of what I thought was my identity too.
    The process of letting go for me felt scary because I felt like I was losing myself. I was the one with wisdom (for my very small group of people mind you)
    Who would I be if I wasn’t that person?
    What I continue to learn and re-learn is that even thought at times surrender feels like a losing of self, the opposite happens. I find my true self in the process…
    A self that is free.
    The self that simply is, the self that is loved, the self that no longer has to prove anything.

This is our true selves. The self that cannot be offended. The self that is loved by God for simply being.
But none of us live out of this self all of the time, and probably never will while we’re alive.
This is why Self emptying isn’t this one time thing, its an every day thing…
Which I find very encouraging in my own contemplative path…
Im not going backwards when I start to cling, it’s simply another opportunity for me to return to the ever present God.

Contemplative practices are super helpful tools that can help us grow these muscles of surrender, so that we may tune into this divine awareness…

But before I jump into what some of those practices are I want to make clear that contemplative seeing is not simply about intellectual understanding.
It’s about integrated awareness. Full being awareness…
This attunement to Gods resonance is not simply in tune through our
Mind- that thinks about God
or our heart- that lovingly embraces God or body,- that senses God
because in this non-dual state of consciousness there is no separation of self.
Which is what Jesus is speaking to when he says, “Love the lord you’re God with all your heart soul and mind.”
It’s this whole being connectedness to the whole…
This was super helpful for me to recognize when I started doing more contemplative practices…
We can think our way to God,
But we can be our way to God, because it’s in our whole undivided being where God Himself dwells.
This is the point of many of the practices. To show up, and simply be present. Without expectation of what we desire God to do….
If we are trying to enter into practices with specific goals and hopes, those things can become the very things that keep us from truly entering in.
Even if they are good things!!! Again Kenosis, Kenosis, Kenosis
The practices are helpful because they help us enter into the present moment, and offer up that position of least resistance:
Contemplative practices are not contemplation in themselves, they simply work our muscles of consent, and can help us enter into that contemplative divine seeing.
Some of those practices being:
Stillness practices: Centering prayer Meditation
Creative Practices: Painting, journaling, singing Relational Practices: Deep listening, storytelling Movement Practices: dance, yoga, labyrinth walking

Truly Contemplation can be found anywhere though, because as we talked about its a way of being and seeing.
Sometimes ill sit and try and surrender and enter in and I just feel more and more distant from God even if mentally I believe thats impossible…
But then other times in my surrender to the moment I am simply overcome by this contemplative mind.
I had a contemplative moment gazing at a bell pepper once! Finley describes contemplative moment like this:
In the quietness of the attentive gaze, one comes upon a certain presciousness, an immediate worth, that which no words can be found….”

Contemplation does not simply stop at conscious awareness.
Some people think that the opposite of contemplation is action, but that’s just not true…
The opposite of contemplation is reaction… an acting out of our small self..
True contemplation will always result in active and dynamic love.
Which makes sense right?
If God is the source of love could entering into the consciousness of Christ result in anything less than love?
I want to end with this picture of The Trinity.
This is Perichorseis. Which is the greek word for the relationship between father son and spirit, whom are continually in relationship with each other both pouring out and receiving love from the other.
And our lives are a part of this sacred dance.
Every day, every moment we are participating in the sacred dance of love.
In
Our waking Our being
Our seeing
Our connecting Our trying
Our failing
Our longing Our searching
All of it, all of life, is steeped in the love of God…
Contemplation is simply a waking up to this reality that is already true.

September 22, 2019

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Guest Speaker: Esther Dewitt

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.  Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put it into practice.  And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4: 4-9

This summer we have been exploring the physiology connected to the psychology that creates the mental, emotional and behavioral patterns that lead us in the wrong direction.  Chuck has been educating us, connecting the science with the spiritual, as we have considered the prospect of re-writing the owner’s and operations manual for our Brain.  The impact this series has had on me has been significant as we have considered how our personal history has been imprinted on our brain and nervous system, forming the habits of our lifetime.  How these, over time, through trauma, hurt, and wounding developed into pathways, the ones that make us feel like we are stuck or heading in the wrong direction, the ones that lead us away from the God of peace and the peace of God, to anxiety, depression, frustration, discouragement, conflict, anger and a host of other harmful and hurtful spaces.

Fortunately, we have not studied this just to discover a hard reality, to be left knowing how we got to the places we don’t want to be.  Our study has been to empower us, to understand that simply because we have been heading in one direction, does not mean we have to stay heading there.  All that we have been learning has been to draw us towards repentance, towards changing our direction.

Repentance is more than quitting a list of clearly articulated biblically wrong behaviors.  We repent not just from a traditionally accepted list of sins. 

Repentance is a changing of direction.  It is more than a change too. 

It is an intentional change of direction.  It is a choosing of a specific direction.  It doesn’t occur automatically or instinctively. It isn’t the simple exchange of one behavior, pattern, way of thinking or doing for another.  Repentance involves the recognition that the well-worn path we have been on is not getting us where we want to go.  In repentance we make the conscious, intentional choice to change direction to move towards God, the God of Peace, away from the paths and patterns that have gotten us stuck, that have caused damage to us and our relationships, and towards healing and in the direction of wholeness and restoration, towards the peace of God.

Romans 2 tells us that it is God’s kindness that leads us to repentance. We are not led to repentance out of punishment or condemnation.

But that doesn’t make it easy. Repentance causes us to forge an unfamiliar course.  It can feel uncomfortable.  It challenges us.  The change of repentance is not easy. 

We do not have make these changes on our own, in our power. In John chapter 14 verses 26 and 27 Jesus tells us that the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.  Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give you.  I do not give as the world gives.  Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

We have help, we have a teacher, to help us turn from our fear and troubled hearts, but it’s a learning process.  We will need to be reminded.  The Holy Spirit will teach us, will remind us.  As we develop new habits, new patterns, we will need that help, those reminders.  That is not failure, it is a part of the process.

Is it worth it?  If we know going in that making changes, heading in a new direction will be hard and uncomfortable, why we would do it?

Why bother?

We do it because we recognize and acknowledge that our current paths are not getting us where we want to be.  They are leading in the wrong direction, possibly in circles, exhausting us without offering real progress, causing damage to our relationships, creating conflict internally and externally.  So even though these thought and behavior patterns seem natural and comfortable, and we follow them instinctively, we know at our core that they can never get us where we want to be, they will never lead us to Spiritual or emotional healing.

And we are all wounded.  We have all been hurt.  Our stories are different, but we are all in need of healing. 

In fact, many of the paths we want to turn from were created as we consciously or unconsciously fled or tried protect ourselves after we were hurt, or when were in search of healing and safety, but they took us in the wrong direction.  Whatever the motive or circumstances that led us there, we don’t have to stay, we are not committed to those paths.  Through the work of the Holy Spirit we have the power, the strength to make the change, to repent and change direction.

The challenge then, is to find strategies to resist returning to the old patterns and paths, to find the tools we need to forge the new path.

We find these strategies in Philippians 4, although because many of us have heard this passage many, many times, we can miss the practical tools it offers.

Several years ago when I was in my training to become a Certified Anger Management Specialist, I found myself in awe that the emotional strategies of our training, although dressed up in psychological terms and labels have at their root these same recommendation of Paul to the church in Philippi.

Does it make you feel any better to know that you are not alone in this process?  It does me.  I am comforted when we are honest together as a community, as followers of Christ, about our need for repentance, our need to change our old patterns.  I am also encouraged by the goal set forward in it, the reward: to experience the peace of God, and the nearness of the presence of the God of peace. Yes, I want less harshness and more gentleness, less anxiety and more thankfulness, I want those things, but I feel a great need to experience more peace, the peace of God, and a great need to experience the presence of the God of peace, and that for me is a reason to step out my comfort zone, away from the natural, instinctive patterns, and towards repentance and new a path that will lead me closer to God.

A biblical strategy to break the cycle

The Living Bible Paraphrased translates Philippians 4:8, fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right.  Think about things that are pure and lovely, dwell on the fine, good things in others.  Think about all you can praise God for and be glad about it.

Our thoughts trigger emotions, which form moods.  In our current culture we are bombarded with bad news.  Bad news sells, it spreads, and it can sink in.  We can easily develop thought patterns of negativity.  We get stuck in the problems, and the worst case scenarios, what is wrong and what might go wrong, in addition to dwelling on what has gone wrong in the past.  These negative thoughts breed fear, worry, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration and a sense of being overwhelmed. The negative spins around, catching us up in its loop.

If we view verse 8 as a strategy to break this cycle, we can see the sign posts for the new path in front of us.  We are encouraged to think on the things that are noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.  The Message translation says that we will do our best by filling our minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious – the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.

I’m not suggesting we stick our heads in the sand over the evil in the world, that we become Polly Anna’s pretending that everything is rosy when it is not.  It is intentionally deciding to spend time thinking about the good, the praiseworthy things.  Especially when you notice that anxiety, anger, depression, and other distressing emotions have settled in. 

So how do we do this?  With intentionality.  We seek out the positive things, we go looking for them.  We capture them, write them down and keep them close to us when we find them, so we can return to them, intentionally and meditate on them.  It may be a photo of nature that reminds you of God’s creativity and beauty, it may be a story of someone doing something heroic, that reminds you of the admirable, or remembering and writing so you can re-visit the kindness that someone showed you.  As you sense the negative input dragging you down the wrong thought and emotional path, your reminders of what is lovely, true, noble, praiseworthy are there and ready for you turn your focus to.  And as we are thinking of these better things, these things to praise, we take the time to thank God for them, remembering that all truly good things come from Him, and this brings us into His peace.  It reminds us that He is good.

Do you find there is a time of day where your thoughts go heavy or dark?  Where your memories return to hurts or disappointments, failures or rejections?  In some quiet space where the memory pattern of your mind naturally returns, triggering sadness, discouragement, fear, or disappointment?  As our notes from the message last week suggested, being aware of these experiences is important if we are to break the patterns.  Again, intentionally being prepared is a key strategy to forming a new habit. 

I have a couple of practices I suggest.  Take a notebook, a journal, a pad of paper, and across the top of multiple blank pages write the title of a list.  Maybe the list is things or people I am thankful for, or the Names of God, or the qualities of God.  Maybe the list is beautiful and amazing things in God’s creation.  Don’t fill out the list, just title it.  Maybe on each page is a different list, maybe the same list for multiple pages.  Then place that journal or notebook or pad, in close proximity to where you frequently are when those repetitive heavy dark thoughts come.  Do you wake up with them many mornings?  Place it by your bed or cereal box or coffee pot, and take 5 minutes to fill out the list when you notice those thoughts.

Are there places you go frequently that trigger these negative thoughts and emotions?  Does a doctor’s office waiting room send you to the purgatory of ‘What If’ or anxiety? Carry your blank list in your car, in a bag, in your wallet, start it as a note on your tablet or phone.  Have it clearly titled and ready, because as the thoughts begin their familiar cycle in your brain, an empty page is usually not enough to interrupt the pattern, and you are more likely to stare at it blankly or to make a chore or shopping list on it.

Being aware means taking the time to check in and pay attention.  What are we experiencing physically, mentally, emotionally? When I listen to this music do I notice myself feeling sad?  When I watch that news do I clench my jaw or tense my shoulders?  When I engage in that activity do I feel drained and empty afterwards?  We can do this as we look for patterns, times and experiences that trigger certain reactions and send us down certain paths, and we apply this awareness to the present, here and now, learning to recognize when we are not where we want to be, and when we want to stop and turn in a different direction.

We can build new and positive experiences, learning to savor them, letting them sink in, marinating them, so that they crowd out the memory space in our limbic system.  They are not erasing previous negative experiences, but they are claiming more of the space.  To do this we often have to interrupt the tyranny of busyness. Let the little things, the positives that you enjoy, add up internally. We help capture these memories by increasing our sensory experiences of them. Breathe in the ocean air, or the mountain air and pause to let it sink in.  Close your eyes to listen to the music, and let it sink in.  Smell the roses, the lilacs, the pine trees.  Stop and feel the sun, the rain drops or the wind on your face.  Catalog in your mind the chill of the evening as you stargaze. Take a photo of the sunset or rainbow, draw or paint the bird.  Watch the squirrel run around, notice how the puppy plays with abandon.  If in the moment we stop and experience as many of the senses as possible during positive experiences, smell, touch, sight, sound we help them seep deep and our brain can memorize those experiences and the positive feelings they trigger.  The moment of calm, the laughter of joy, the wonder of beauty.  These are building new paths, paths towards internal healing.

Try writing about your positive experiences shortly after you have them.  Writing a couple of paragraphs about the beauty or joy or wonder of the sunset or sunrise, the waterfall, playing with the child, or singing in the car. If you don’t like to write in paragraphs, make a quick list. The senses you experienced, your thoughts, your emotions – all of the positive ones you can remember.  If you took a photo or made a drawing, give it a caption, a description that identifies the positives.  It is a conscious re-living of the positive and it helps to consolidate those memories, storing them more securely. If you tell someone else about them, you are reinforcing the memory again.

Build positive connections with Scriptures as well.  Ask the Holy Spirit if there is a message from Scripture for you in the experience. As you reflect on your positive experience does it remind you of a Scripture?  This is just for you, it doesn’t have to make sense to others.  As you remember the amazing piece of pie does it make you think of “taste and see that the Lord is good”, as you admired the full moon did it remind you of the verse “praise Him sun and moon, praise Him all you shining stars.” (Psalm 148:4).  If a verse or passage comes to mind write it down.  Sometimes nothing pops up right away, but later we are reading and the positive memory returns, and we see a connection to the verse, write that down, record it next a note about your experience.  If you printed out a picture, write the verse on the back of the photo, place it somewhere you will see it and be reminded of it.

It took a while for most of our old patterns to be formed.  It can take a while for these new ones to be formed.  It isn’t a magic wand.  We make a plan, intentionally practice the plan, then rinse and repeat.  Repetition is how the new paths become natural, normal, and even comfortable.  We keep returning to listen to the Holy Spirit, it’s not a one-time lesson, and we are not failing because we need reminders.

Focusing awareness on our thoughts

One of the most un-natural and yet important things we can do in the changing, the repentance, process is to challenge our thoughts.  Our thoughts can lie to us.  Just because we think something that does not mean that it is true.  Our thoughts may have been formed from false input, what others told us and we accepted, or by faulty conclusions, how we processed and made sense of information.  We can question our thoughts, challenge them, seek out the truth, and choose to replace the lies we previously believed.

This is especially true with our thoughts about God and how He feels about us, and our thoughts about ourselves, our worth, our value, and our abilities.  How easy it is to believe thoughts like “this is just how I am”, “God is angry with me or disappointed with me”, “it’s too late for me to change”, “God could never use me”, “I am not enough or I am too much”.

 We can challenge these thoughts head on, by identifying them, recognizing them and countering them.  We evaluate what emotions these thoughts lead us to, how they make us feel. If the result of the thought is discouragement, depression, anxiety, wanting to give in and give up, then we can assume that the thought is not of the Lord, and that it is not true.  If you are battling these thoughts, you don’t need to condemn yourself because you have believed them, or beat yourself up because you accepted them without questioning them previously, but you can counter them now. 
• We can search the Scriptures to see how much God loves us, the worth He placed on saving us, and the hope that He offers us that we can indeed leave the old behind and grow into maturity. 
• We can meditate on these Scriptures, asking the Holy Spirit to show us how we are loved, how our strength and courage comes from the Lord, is given by Him for us to access. 
• And,when the thoughts return,we can call them lies, counter them with the truth of Scripture, and refuse to dwell on them or believe them.
• We can also watch out for where some of the thoughts might be originating.  Sometimes the negative voices around us are so critical, so loud, so repetitive that we adopt their messages in our own thoughts, but really they are external messages, that we have internalized.  Once we recognize that the message is external, and is not true, about us, about God and how He feels about us, we can counter it even more effectively, and in some cases limit its access to us.
• We can replace those messages with trusted, positive voices of truth.  Whether that is spending more time with encouraging and uplifting people in our lives, or listening to or reading messages based in the truth of the Word given to bless and encourage us, building us up in our faith rather than tearing us down, we can seek out sources that help us counter the lies with truth.

Is worry the well-worn path you want to turn from?  Does anxiety crowd out joy and peace for you?  How easy and natural it is to let fear and worry settle in.  We know what has gone wrong in the past.  We can imagine what can go wrong in the future.  It can be intense, gripping our minds and our emotions. And we are not alone.  There are things that trouble our minds and our hearts, there are real and potential dangers ahead.  We are not asked to pretend, or live in a false sense of reality. The instruction to the Philippians applies to us here as well.  When those worries and concerns arrive in our thoughts, instead of marinating in them, we take them to the Lord.  The Message says: “Instead of worrying, pray.  Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.”  The Living New Testament translation says: Don’t worry about anything, instead pray about everything: tell God your needs and don’t forget to thank Him for His answers. If you do this you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand.  His peace will keep your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.

The strategy here is to acknowledge when the worry or concern comes up in our thoughts, and to use that as a reminder to pray, to take the issue to God.  This isn’t telling us to feel guilty when worry comes, but rather not to soak in it, but to take that worry to God in prayer.  We not only pray for the issue of concern but we pray and ask God to give us His peace in the midst of the situation.  This is easier said than done.  It also doesn’t come naturally. It also requires intentionality.  Spending time meditating, and marinating mentally, on God’s faithfulness, God’s goodness, can help. 

Relational conflicts

The conflicts in our lives are not limited to internal experiences.  Our relationships, even the most important and dear to us, are at risk of conflict.  When individuals are in distress, it very easily leads to relationships in distress.

In Romans 12:18, we are encouraged to live in peace with others, as much as it is our power to do so.  Sometimes we don’t have the control, sometimes it is not in our power to resolve a conflict peacefully, but there are some practical things we can do, to help increase the odds, and to give us the confidence that we have done what we can.

Often one of the most valuable practices we can engage in is to prioritize the relationship over the issue.  Sometimes the issue is life and death, putting other key relationships in peril, or in some other way is so important that it rises above the relationship, but frequently, if we really consider the issue involved in a conflict, we realize that we would rather keep the relationship than win the issue.  Since we cannot always have the win and the relationship, we may need to prioritize, to make a conscious choice.  I love win-win situations, where I can find a resolution where everyone wins.  But sometimes the real win is in the forfeit, in letting something go to hold on to the more valuable.  We can get in a winning – need to be right – want it our way mindset. 

Sometimes when mediating a family dispute I will ask the parties separately, if they win the issue, but lose the relationship, will they be satisfied with that result.  It’s an important thing to consider, as it brings perspective.  It is easy to let little things get big fast.

When we separate the issue from the individual, and decide that a relationship is more than important than the issue we can return to the practices from Philippians 4 again, taking the time to list the things that are good about the person, that we appreciate and value, intentionally reminding ourselves of their value in our lives.  We break the mental cycle of thinking about the problem, and turn towards the person.  And as we do, we ask the Lord for His peace and we that He will guard our hearts and minds from returning to the old pattern.

And then there is unity without uniformity.  We can be in relationship, even close relationship, without agreement.  Even on important issues.  We do not have to let significant differences and disagreements lead to conflict.  We can give each other permission to come to different conclusions without the continual need for us to try to change their mind or convince them of our side.  We can choose to respect differences without succumbing to the temptation to demean them.  We can learn from each other through respectful dialogue or make a conscious decision not to bring up topics and issues that will tempt us to elevate hot-button or sensitive subjects.  This isn’t easy to do, it’s a discipline, because most of us are passionate about our positions and we want to convert or persuade our loved ones to our side of an issue.  And there may be a time and place for that, but we have to provide the space and grace, the honor and respect, for individuals to come to different conclusions.  This may be a particularly useful strategy during the upcoming election cycle, but it is not limited to political issues.

When we are willing to recognize that all kinds of issues are frequently complex and nuanced, and that we each bring our background and our experiences with us as we form our positions, we can grow to respect that other individuals may not agree with us, and that doesn’t make them all wrong and us all right, it doesn’t mean they are ignorant, or stupid or stand as evidence of our superior intellect or good judgement. When we release the requirement for uniformity within our relationships we find a new strength, a richness in the diversity, and often the tensions that lead to conflict are lessened.

In choosing to take the time to think on things that are of good report, fixing our thoughts on what is true and good, on the good in others, we are making a choice not to dwell on the negative things, on the things we disapprove of in the lives of our loved ones.  It’s not that we are not aware or are in denial, but we are not allowing those things to dominate our thoughts about the people we care about. In fact we can release our right to approval, and disapproval to help restore our relationships. 

We form our approval, and our disapproval around what makes us comfortable, what matches our taste, what we are accustomed to or would like to become accustomed to.  And then we impose that on other people.  We want them to dress in a certain way, behave in a certain way, fit into our expectations in a certain way, so that we are not uncomfortable. It becomes a way to control others to relieve our own distress. We are not forced to change how we interact with world around us, to question our views or expectations, if other people behave in a way that meets our approval.  When people challenge the norms, or what we wish were the norms, psychologically we can feel like it is challenging how we fit in the world around us, challenging our very interpretation of life.  Imposing our disapproval on the behaviors of others, is our way of expressing our discomfort at the pace of change and growth around us.  Sometimes we disapprove because people seem stuck in the old ways and are not embracing societal changes, sometimes we disapprove because we are the ones not ready to change. 

Sometimes we attach a moral value to a taste or cultural difference.  We disapprove and say that it is wrong, when in reality it is unfamiliar or different.  In the church we can attach sin to these issues as well.  I went to a Baptist college where women were required to wear skirts or dresses below their knees to church, chapel and class.  It was a sin to wear pants, a sign of rebellion.  The disapproval that leadership felt over societal changes in women’s clothing over the previous decades, was imposed on all students in attendance.  I worked with another ministry organization that was constantly updating the views of what style of dress was appropriate for God fearing Christian women in leadership.  The disapproval of a few was used to control the actions of others.  Imposing our views of approval on others is demeaning, it is patronizing, it says loudly and clearly that we don’t trust their judgement or ability to form their ideas on what is appropriate.  It says we don’t trust them to listen to the Holy Spirit or to read the Word and learn healthy and appropriate boundaries for behavior. And frequently it backfires, causing people to truly rebel and chose even more extreme expressions of independence from our influence.

To build healthy respectful relationships, we can let go of the power of our approval over others.  We can intentionally choose to follow the instruction of Philippians 4, dwelling on the fine, good things in others, turning our thoughts away from those behaviors we don’t like, spending time looking for and acknowledging the good. It is not us compromising our own values, morals or beliefs to acknowledge that we are not responsible or accountable for the choices and decisions of others. We can trust other people to make choices in their lives without thrusting our own discomfort or distress on them.  I’m not suggesting that we throw out all laws and rules or even dress codes or social behavioral norms, but I am offering as a strategy in personal relationships, especially those damaged by conflict, to try to let go of the expectation that our approval or disapproval of their behavior, and their willingness to conform to it, is a litmus test for our love and support.  When people we love make choices and decisions that we not only disapprove of, but that we see are hurting them, we can pray for them, trusting the Holy Spirit to do a work, acknowledging the strength of our disapproval is not match for God’s love for our loved ones.  Deciding not to hoist our approval or disapproval on others probably won’t change their behavior and may not change our comfort level regarding it, but it is an acknowledge that their decisions and actions are probably not about us at all, and can help us have compassion for them, and if they are behaviors meant to make us uncomfortable, to stick it to us or punish us in some way, then our disapproval wasn’t really helping the situation at all.

None of these strategies are very easy to practice, they all require change, and when we are in distress, when we are discouraged, overwhelmed or in conflict it can feel like the hardest time to make a change.  We are already feeling drained and weak and finding the momentum to change from pathways and patterns that we are used to and that come instinctively can feel impossible.  I think that’s the beauty of the community of faith.  Together, here, we practice Meditation, we practice inviting the Lord in, quietly listening, waiting on Him.  What at first feels awkward and uncomfortable slowly becomes comfortable, even natural.  And in our practices we can encourage each other, support each other.  We are not in this alone.

It’s okay to ask for help.  If in the process of re-writing our brain’s manual we discover trauma we need help with, it’s okay to seek that help, to get that help.  If we need help in restoring our relationships, we can get that help, and that’s not a failure.  Whether it’s a counselor, therapist, mediator, prayer partner, or other source of help, it’s okay.  This isn’t a pick up yourself up by your boot straps and figure it out process.  This is a community, growing in love, teaching one another about the peace of God and together growing in our relationship with the God of peace. This is us sharing the inexhaustible riches and generosity of Christ with each other.

May the Lord Bless You and Keep You, May the Lord’s face radiate with joy because of you.
May He be gracious to you, Show you His favor and give you His peace.

“UNSTUCK !” Ezekiel 33:10-11 Chuck Smith Jr. May 9, 2010

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Do you feel like you are on an inevitable path to destruction ?  In this study we learn through the example of  Biblical narratives  that we do have a choice and that we can get  “unstuck” from habitually destructive practices.  Chuck teaches the importance of practicing silent prayer and thus learning to respond vs. react in critical life moments and decisions.